POVERTY, A STATE OF MIND

pov·er·ty n
1. the state of not having enough money to take care of basic needs such as food, clothing, and housing
2. a deficiency or lack of something
3. lack of soil fertility or nutrients

Encarta® World English Dictionary © 1999 Microsoft Corporation. All rights reserved. Developed for Microsoft by Bloomsbury Publishing Plc.
Whoa! That’s a big slice. But not, if you have a big appetite. And it seems the majority of humans have an insatiable appetite for things.
I first became aware of this when we arrived in West Germany in 1957 after our escape from Hungary. I could not speak the German language but I had made some friends and we played after school soccer or cowboys and Indians and somehow I was most of the time a redskin. That was not surprising for me because I have dreamed often about living with horses free like the wind and roaming on the Pusta (Hungarian for Prairie) where you could see on Wednesday both Sundays and didn’t had to go to church. The cowboys had guns around their waists, which made sounds like guns, hats on their heads and a star on their vests. I had a naked upper body, paint of coal on my face, and a loincloth over my underwear. For a weapon I had a stick that was either a rifle or a spear, depending on demand, and my mind to dig traps, lay tripping wires and hide in plain sight. I learned to be a savage early and enjoyed it. My cowboy friends thought I was an Indian because I was poor and could not afford a cowboy outfit. They also got a cold at least twice a year and did what the white man was doing to the red man, giving them the flu for his land.
After I was killed and properly mutilated and then massacred my friends thanked god for his help in getting rid of the heathen, godless wild savages and invited me to watch TV with them because it is the right thing to do when you have killed them. No one should have to die without having the chance to watch TV after death. (With the programs today that will finish you off for good.)
I enjoyed watching a show where a little guy with an umbrella and wits was fighting guys with guns and muscles and won. I was fascinated how I was able to see pictures in a small box and it was just like in the movies. Then my friends asked me why we didn’t have a TV. I had had no idea why we should have had one. They had one and many of us were able to watch it. But he said it was theirs and if we had one too, then we didn’t have to watch theirs. What was his point? We were all together and had a good time and did not harm the TV by looking at it. Then he said the word: youarepoorandcannotaffordaTV. Till then I never felt poor, not even in Hungary when we had nothing to eat for two weeks. We felt hungry but not poor. So I told my father that we were poor because we did not have a TV and he bought one. We were rich. A few years later we were poor again because we did not have a colour TV. And so we were poor in a country that had everything and we didn’t. It seemed like we would never ever have enough because there was always more to be had.
So I was poor for many years but still today I don’t know what it feels like to be poor. I felt hungry, thirsty, angry, cheated, betrayed, deserted, to name some of the things that I would consider bad feelings but how does it feel to be poor?
I own a sailing yacht that many rich people envy me for and it is not big if you consider 11.65m enough for a couple. They tell me how they wish to have a lifestyle like I have and how they could never afford it. They have millions, so why not? I’m broke most of the time to the point where I cannot even pay attention, so why would they, with all the money they have, feel that they would not be able to afford it? Do they feel poor?
How does it feel like to have all that money and not be able to afford a lifestyle like mine?
Somehow that money or the way they manage it must make them feel poor. Or maybe it is greed that there will never be enough to afford a lifestyle that is free from the feeling of poverty. Poor rich man.
Again, in Buddhism there is a saying that says: “ True happiness is wanting what you have, not having what you want.
Could it be that this poverty has its roots in the need to prove to others that they are worthy of their respect and love? What and to whom do they have to prove anything? Or are they slaves to their possessions? I found out long ago; I don’t own things, they owned me. It seems the key to wealth is in the ability to let go. We may use things and with the purchase of them we earned the right to do so, but that should not turn us into bondage. In my life I have moved from one house into another and for a time it was my place but when I moved out it became someone else’s. I USED IT FOR A TIME BUT IT WAS NOT MINE. All things I can touch can be taken from me in a snap of a finger but the things that really matter nobody can take. Love, Wisdom, Knowledge and Experience are the things we acquire things with.
But we are so attached to things that we even call children, husbands, wives and friends ours and overlooking the fact, they are with us, not for us.
What makes us rich is the ability to experience all that life offers, the love we have for the experience, the wisdom of acceptance and the knowledge how to utilize it.
So my childhood in Hungary and Germany was a great preparation for my future outlook on life and how I look at fairness and justice. I understood that it was not important to own things but to share them with others. That way we all took responsibility for its maintenance and enjoyed an afternoon together after the killing was over. Us redskins were treated to TV and snacks after our torments, the cowboys had their share on bruises and justice was done when they had to accompany their parents to church while we Indians hid in the woods. Who says there is no god?
I felt no poverty and now in Mexico I see people who claim to be poor by North American standards but I see them laughing more, their children seem to be happy with the things they got but when they grow up the same poverty stricken expression sets on their faces as I see on other adults who have everything. I think the wanting more is the problem and it creates a feeling of being poor. To me, the bigger the distance between what we have and what we wish for, determines the degree of our unhappiness and poverty.
Worth remembering these lessons came full into play when I had encountered the opposite sex. There was this Goddess of my youth in her glory playing a murderous flirting game with all my friends and there was not one who did not want to die for her. (Being mutilated was not considered dying) Our fantasies had no limits and inside of two minutes we went through all possible scenarios from courtship to divorce by beheading.
You probably know the game “spin the bottle” and we played that game on a day when there was this Goddess around and that became an obsession with me. My friends knew of my affection and used it shamelessly to call her to play. Due my newly discovered “poverty” I did not have the guts to ask her out or to even consider myself a possible candidate to participate in the game. I had nothing of value to offer and so remained in the background while all the guys had a good time and enjoyed kissing this girl that was in my fantasies 26 hours a day. (I borrowed the two hours from the end of my life)
Then the incredible happened; the bottle pointed at me through a gap that opened temporarily when one of the boys shifted his position. I nearly fainted from the joy and the fear that sprung up like a grasshopper. My heart stuck in my throat and I put all my weight into my pants at the same time. All eyes were on me and hers were the only one that I noticed. There was a mixture of panic and fear and I thought repulsion. I could not move and someone shoved me toward her with the words: “We’re waiting. Hurry up.” What they were waiting for I never know but when she just kissed me on the forehead, I felt the whole world collapsing and the whole weight of it crushing me. How I made it home is still an unknown accomplishment and my face was still there but there was something wrong with the mirror, because my face looked somehow distorted and my eyes were swimming in a lake. The humiliation of rejection paralyzed me and I thought it had something to do with the situation of being poor. Shortly after we moved to another town and I was spared the agony to see her going out with one of my friends that was now the god we all wanted to be.
Years later I met her again and she looked incredible, still single and working as a photo model for a clothing company. Not as shy as when I was younger I asked her out for a movie and she agreed. We met two hours before the show and while having I bite to eat our conversation came to that game with the bottle. To my question why she had kissed me only on the forehead she replied: “You were always different from the other guys and not very popular because of the way you talk and act. I knew you liked me and I liked you too, but I enjoyed the attention of all the guys and did not want to be seen hanging out with you and be seen as weird as you.”
Not that this made me feel better but I was relieved to know that it had nothing to do with me having no money or things. I relaxed and from then on we were friends and if I would not have had a girlfriend at the time, who knows what would have happened.

It looks to me that the image of poverty is only in the mind and then affects our behaviour, stifles our creativity and drive for adventure.
We like to believe that other countries that have not as much as we do are poor and need our help. This makes us feel good not the ones we degrade with our gifts.
It’s been said: The easiest way to keep a beggar a beggar is to give them. This allows us to feel superior and demonstrate our “goodness”. That is the ultimate in humiliating others. It is not poverty this people fear as much as the condescending attitude from the “good Samaritan” if they still have some dignity left. And giving is condescending any way you look at it.
You may recall the proverb: If I give you fish today, you have something to eat for today. If I teach you how to fish, you have fish every day.
Old sayings are old because they have enduring truth in them.
Poverty exists only in rich peoples mind and those who want more, the others just work to live and don’t think much about it. There is no shame in not having more than what is needed to live but we are not satisfied with that and so we hoard large quantities of money, food or things for future use and then we die howling that we have not use the things while living.
You know, there are no limits to greed but there is one for moderation. The art of living is with how little you can do with, not with how much. Any idiot can live with a lot and only the wise know how much is needed.
As I mentioned before, I have a sailboat and some people look at it and thinking I must be stinking rich because I have a boat. They have a house, a car, TV, video and stereo equipment that would blast holes into the fabric of our universe and they envy me for the boat and thinking I’m rich? That is all I have as far as things go. No big car, a house with three bedrooms, kitchen, bathrooms, storage and garage, a patio and backyard, but I live free and go when and where I want to for as long as I like. I work where I am and when I need money. When I want a change of scenery, I cast off the lines or weigh anchor and move. No packing things and discover all that junk that I once thought I would use one day, no real estate problems and all that comes with it.
You see, when you own a house that house is yours, not the one in front or behind you, to the right or to the left, but the one you are living in. When you own a boat the whole world is yours. You don’t have to own a lot of things to enjoy them and you may remain poor and be rich.
I took out a lot of people sailing without getting paid for it and made friends. When I needed assistance they came to my aid even with money. Some took off time from their busy schedule to transport an engine to the repair shop, others lend me money to get the repairs done and some carried parts through customs on risk of discovery of smuggling. Money is not that important as we like to think. You are rich when you have friends. Know how to make them and be theirs also. You will be surprised how much people will value real friendship that comes from an authentic amity because there is not much of it around anymore. We often buy “friendship” because it’s easier than to earn friendship but how enduring is that? We all know the answer.
Cultivating friendships is where wealth is found, in mutual support and in assistance, not help, to get out of a difficult situation. When help is necessary, it should be only used when there are no other options to assist. The word help implies that the other cannot get out of the situation on his or her accord and we got to be careful not to come across superior. A good way is to ask for something in return that the other can do.
That would allow them to retain their dignity and after they recovered we may ask for the balance if there is any. But the way we are today, we maintain the thought and condition of poverty because we need it to feel good about ourselves when we give. It releases us from feeling guilty about having and they have not, so by giving we can always say that we do the best to eliminate poverty but do not realize that we are in fact perpetuating it. Why in the world would anyone want to work when you get it for free? All one needs to do is look poor and hold up a can and some mug comes along to release some guilt.
Look at some welfare recipients. I heard many of them saying that they would be stupid to work for minimum wages when they get more from welfare for doing nothing.
Need more examples?
I wanted to find out how it feels to be begging for food or money so I stopped shaving for a few days and very much to my discomfort avoided water. Within three days I felt like a bear, not strong physically but in smell. Then I sat on the curb of a busy street and in a jiffy I was chased away by another gruff looking individual who owned that section of the street. After a while one of the gruff-squad members took pity on me and told me to go home and clean up. He did not buy my act. I explained to him what I wanted to do and he, for a price, offered the information I sought. That would not do so I insisted that he let me do my own begging and finally he agreed to “rent” me a section of his street. For a week I begged money, food and advise from my “rental agent” how to make money. He never told me but volunteered to give me some insight into his income per week. It was more than I made when I was working as a painter for an outfit in Vancouver. When I expressed my doubt he gave me an example. He approached a car with a women sitting inside getting ready to go shopping and he changed his behaviour to a subservient one and became a helpless “invalid” in an instant. I would not have recognized him if I would not have known him for a week. What he was saying I could not hear but after three minutes or less he came to me and tossed me a twenty-dollar bill. “Keep it,” he said. “I get some more. Wait here.” With that he left and I decided to get a coffee. When I returned to my section, he was there, took my coffee and showed me another ten-dollar bill. I was just looking at the money and wondered how in the world he did that. “You got to act, man.” His act must have been good enough to go to Hollywood. “I could stroke easy 500 a day without sweat but I don't do coke and I work only four hours. Tops”
I made $120, - in eight hours as a painter when I started.
He may have been an exception but he charged me $100 a day for sitting on my butt and collecting haemorrhoids and change.
There is an untapped income tax source bureaucrats would love to know about.

What is poverty? Just a perception from the outside, slogans that can be exploited like anything else. It is all business and has nothing to do with humanitarianism but a lot with humanity at large.